The Certified 23-Flavor Addict
You don't drink Dr Pepper. You're in a relationship with it.

This is someone’s diagnosis. What’s yours?
Take the test →Diagnosis · scores 17–20 of 24
Let's not sugar-coat it (the soda already did that). You can name the flavors, you ration the last can in the fridge, and you've absolutely driven out of your way for a refill. This is a serious, committed, certified habit, and you wear it like a badge. The good news: you're in excellent (terrible) company. The better news: there is a whole site here that gets you completely.
“The Dr Pepper addiction test certified me: The Certified 23-Flavor Addict. I don't drink Dr Pepper, I'm in a relationship with it. It's serious.”
Your prescription